Blessed all along (part 4.3)

This week has been a super-fast week. Before I know it, Friday says goodbye and Saturday says hello. It’s good though. I miss KL so much. If there’s no surprise audit or courses in the coming weeks, I might go back for a few days come early Dec.  There’s wind of a new shift plan in the pipes, 20 days of working, and 10 days off, hopefully that plan comes true. I missed running near Lake Permaisuri. I miss enjoying coffee at one of the cafes in KLCC whilst watching the crowd. I miss a lot of things.

*****

While reading the young lady’s blog I noticed 3 other blog links which she followed. One blog name caught my eye. So I clicked and I read. The blog was an epitome of humility, tranquility and an unconditional love of one mother for her family. I was surprised to come across a bag of written words which were not ashamed to admit the difficulties of her life before. Her honesty wounded my ego. Her struggle to keep her family happy reminded me why mothers were/are so revered in religions and generic moral concept. Also it gave me another idea why my mother remained strong-willed throughout her difficulties. Mothers, they always have their family first in mind. I am thankful for that.

If she didn’t remain sane, I would have probably ended up a drug addict or some sort of a useless bump crouching underneath a bridge somewhere. Nauzubillah

One thing that I was jealous of whilst perusing the content of the blog was the open expression of reciprocal love between the family members. I was too egoistical to do that. I wanted to learn how. It seemed easy but not to me. I woud learn. In Malay, masih bertatih. The last Ramadhan I managed to initiate the process. It was an enlightenment like no other. I felt refresh. I cried afterward. I was glad that little by little I was beginning to embrace such a nikmat. These blogs taught me a lot: You gotta work for your own happiness and you got nothing to lose by loving your family and expressing it and most importantly be grateful, be very grateful.

*****

Oral exam 2nd attempt. We went through the air legislation again and this time the surveyor was happy and impressed. We went into the technical parts, a few hiccups and he couldn’t accept it. “Awak ni, anak saya dekat New Zealand dah nak habis dah doctorate dia”, he repeated the same story but this time my answer was different,” Dah jalan rezeki saya macam ni Haji, saya terima je lah”. I accepted my defeat and he gave me 2 weeks to prepare for the next attempt. For you readers info, usually for the 3rd attempt, you only need to cover the points which you failed to answer during the 2nd attempt. I promised him that I would come up with the answers for the failed questions.

3rd attempt: He was extremely happy with my answers. I showed him manual references, I mentioned terms which he wanted to hear, I gave him actual situation example. He was happy and pleased. “Sebenarnya, oral exam ni bukan setakat nak tahu betul salah je. Dia nak test your confidence. One day when you are working on the aircraft, you will have to convince the pilot, the crew, the passengers that the aircraft is safe. How to convince? Kalau you sendiri tak yakin dengan diri you?” I gave him my fullest attention. “Oklah, oral dah habis, you tunggu surat je lah”. He shaked my hand and I thanked him for the chance and the wisdom.

A week after my license was issued. For some it might have been an easy road. Not for me. Not for my batch. We had to deal with uncertainties and the wait. My God, the wait. If you asked me, part of being a licensed aircraft maintenance engineer from my experience is you have to be very good in waiting. You gotta wait to be approved for the exam, you gotta wait for your turn to sit for the exam, you gotta wait for the result of the exam (3 months after the exam!), if you failed, you gotta go to step 1 and wait some more, if you passed, you gotta wait for your turn to be interviewed, if you failed…the keypoint is wait. Man, it really was a test of perseverance. Glad I made through that.

*****

Next step, I wanted to travel the world. “Kamu ni betul ke nak kerja kat Miri? Apasal sebenarnya?” my father asked me through the phone. “Wa nak travel the world pa. Banyak tempat wa boleh pergi dengan lesen ni”. “Habis tu bila nak settle down? Kamu kena ingat, a rolling stone gathers no moss”.

“Wa tahu. Wa malas nak pikir dulu benda-benda tu. Jadi jadilah. Lagipun company yang wa nak join ni collaborate dengan international punya company. Who knows pa. “

“Mama tak kisah kamu nak kerja dekat mana wa, tapi ingat who you are. Jangan tinggal agama”.

I was afraid. But due to the lessons I’ve learned I was letting my ambition to be my guidance and my pillar.

And the earth becomes my throne

I adapt to the unknown

Under wandering stars I’ve grown

I ask no one~Metallica (Black Album) Wherever I May Roam (Chorus goes like: “Anywhere I roam, where I lay my head is home)

To be continued…

I was 11 when I learned of the album. I think it was my cousin who influenced me. Lyrically, Metallica is amongst the best.

 

 

 

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